Waiting for the sirens' call

i dont want to be sent sweet jasmine tea or a book he loved. I dont want some cd that echoes all that he is. god! i dont want to hear his voice and how it reminds me of the things i had let drift away. the silence over the phone just cut us. didnt he hear it?

i shouldnt have to feel so guilty but thats what he makes me feel. bah!

i seem to always say i want i want i want or i dont want i dont want i dont want, i i i i i i i . how selfish do i sound?! i really hope it isnt, it doesnt feel like it is, because i try not to act as callous as it may seem. just a pounding i get in my head that doesnt leave. i dont say anything, but maybe i should, sometimes.

things just kind of surface at the most wackiest of timing, at least it keeps life intersting. but all i want is a dark haired fruit stacker... not asking too much really :p

okay i should go and finish the intro and conclusion of my essay. im getting to that distracted stage, where your close to finishing, but you just cant concentrate.

thanks for saturday night simone, karen and sarah. i was scared to go to bed cause i thought erin might crawl through my window.

-a matter of complication when you become a twist-